The short version
- Jealousy and monitoring are control, not proof of love.
- Sexual images of under-18s are illegal even when self-taken.
- If someone threatens to share your images, that's abuse — you are the victim, not the one in trouble.
- A relationship that shrinks your other relationships is a warning sign.
What healthy actually feels like
Healthy relationships are boring in a specific way: you're not constantly monitoring the temperature. You can disagree without it becoming a crisis, you keep your other friendships, and you don't have to manage their moods to stay safe.
- You can say no without a punishment afterwards.
- They're pleased when good things happen to you.
- You both apologise and change behaviour, not just apologise.
- You still have your own friends, hobbies and phone privacy.
- Conflict happens and it doesn't feel like the end of everything.
Control disguised as love
The most common red flags don't look like villainy at the start. They look like intensity, protectiveness and passion. Watch for anything that shrinks your world.
- Checking your phone, location, or wanting your passwords.
- Getting angry about your friends, family or time apart.
- Extreme jealousy framed as "I just love you so much".
- Threatening to leave, self-harm, or share images to get something.
- Insults dressed as jokes, then "you're too sensitive".
- Escalating from zero to soulmates in two weeks, then getting possessive.
- Any physical fear at all — even once.
Online and image-based pressure
Sexual images of anyone under 18 are illegal to create, send or hold — including images of yourself. Beyond the law, once an image leaves your device you have no control over it.
If an image of you has been shared or someone is threatening to share one, that's a crime being committed against you, not something you're in trouble for. Report It / Take It Down services exist specifically to get images removed, and telling a trusted adult is the fastest route to help.
Check what stuck
Quick multiple choice, with an explanation after every answer. Nobody sees your score.